Sunday, April 12, 2009

Why does God Prefers Younger Ones?

I write this with a very sad state of mind. It is about two losses of my life. The first one was six years back and the second was just four days back. I lost my brothers. Both were younger to me. First brother whom I lost six years back, was a very loving brother for all the siblings. My father passed away 54 years back. I was living with my husband's family. My mother, three brothers and a sister became almost helpless. My first brother took it as a challenge to lift the family from a very difficult condition. He was just 18. Working in a private company in Calcutta. Along with work, he did his M.Com and got a job in LIC at Calcutta. The second brother after completing his SSLC started an ayurvedic medical shop. He was very brilliant in studies, but the circumstances forced him to discontinue studies. After some time, a primary school started in our village. He managed to do teachers training and got a job as a teacher in that school. Then the ayurvedic shop became part-time. He looked after the family, with the help of my first brother's financial support. They managed to conduct marriage of my younger sister. Then my first brother moved to kerala from calcutta, and he got married. He couldn't take his wife to place where he worked, as he wanted to save as much money for the education of the youngest brother. The youngest one completed his B.Ed course and got a job as a teacher. He had to wait for 2 years to take his wife to the place where he worked. His sudden demise six years back was a real shock for me. I can not forget the help that he has done to me. Realizing that my son could not get good education in our native village, he took him with him to Trivandrum, put him in a good school, then college and ensured that he became an engineer. With that help, my son went on to do a Ph.D. from IIT. He helped everyone who needed help. Be it relatives or not. His life was full of selfless service, that too without making any noise. When he left us, I prayed to god "Why are you taking younger ones keeping me here, who is elder?"

Last week my youngest brother passed away in a sudden heart attack. He too was very loving brother and we all siblings had a special consideration for the youngest one. His children are settled and in the last two months he spent time with his one year old grandson. I can imagine how happy he would have been playing with his grand child. My great grand children are older than his grandson. Memories are fresh in my mind, when he grew in my lap, when he was infant and young boy. Because of circumstances at home, I had to take care of him and his all needs during his childhood. My mother was going through a bit of depression at that time. During his first job as a teacher in my village (where i was staying with my husband's family) he stayed with us for two years. At that time I didn't have to do anything for him. It was my mother-in-law who took care of him just as her own son. I believe that, my mother-in-law's love towards him was a reflection of her love towards me. He use to call us once in a while to talk over phone. Just two weeks back, he was expressing his happiness of spending time with his grand son. I couldn't bear the news of his passing away. I am still in shock. Again the same question pops up in my mind when I pray "Why are you taking the younger ones keeping me here, who is elder?".

7 comments:

Nanditha Prabhu said...

i know how you must be feeling and i was expecting this post from you .... after venting your feelings through words I am sure you r feeling much better .... but the loss you experience now cannot be replaced .....
The questions that have sprouted in your mind are only natural responses of any human mind ....
You are a person with a strong will power and with the strongest weapon I have always admired "prayer"...when you sit before your Lord with your eyes closed and when your mind calms down , I am sure you will get answers to your question .....
Let us pray for the soul of Rishi Abu ....He has just left his mortal body ....(it might seem big words from a small mouth ) ....
And you are still here because .. we all need you and still love you .. take care ammumma .. May Abu's soul rest in peace ...

Jaishree said...

I really feel sorry. My heartfelt condolences to your family... I know no words will be enough to console your loss. . Wish you to recover soon from all the pains of mind... Time will heal everything. Hope everything turns back to normal. Take care of yourself!

Suma Rajesh said...

Its a touching post ammumma, and was indeed a shocking news and i can imagine how you will feel tooo...as nandukka said, rishi abu just left his mortal body... its true, but his presences and memories would always cherish our mind. My peace be in rishi abu..Take care ..love u always..

Naveen said...

what nandukka said is so true .... we all need you & will need you for ever ...

being the wonderful person that he was ... able to find humour in the mundane .... memories of rishi abu will continue to inspire us ...

lot's of love to you ...

Sujith Shenoy said...

i am deeply touched after reading this....no words or comfort are good enough to replace the loss...i have nothing more to say but to remain in silence and pray god for Rishi Abu's soul to rest in peace...we all need you & we all love you....take care ammumma....

GentleLavender said...

I was deeply touched to read this as I have also learned to cope with the distress of losing someone. In my case, my baby died. But yes, I understand your grief and hope you will pray to God for strength. That is what I have done all these years.

AMRITHA said...

Dear maayee,
Sorry to know about the sudden demise of your dear brother. We got to know only now about this tragedy. Our Hearty Condolences ...

I got your second masterpiece from Girija . It was so nice of you to consider me for reading and giving my opinion. I have started reading and plan to finish it by this week-end. Another family story beautifully weaved intricately...... Have reached till Part five. Will get back to you soon.
Regards to all.
amritha pai